The Day I Stopped Believing in Santa and God

So this is the story about how I stopped believing in Santa and God on the same day. It's a rather funny story, full of innocence lost. While I hope no young children should ever read this and ruin the idea of Santa, I wonder how many other children learned there is no Santa in the same manner.

So I was 8, and living with my mom who was a working mom single parent. She was the absolute best. We had just finished putting the star on the tree, and the milk and cookies out for Santa. I left a note by the cookies, and was off to bed. Or so my mom thought. I did go into my room for a short bit, and pretended to fall asleep, but I was only faking when she came in to check on me.

Finally after I heard her bedroom door close, I snuck out into the living room and sat quietly near the tree waiting for Santa. There were a few presents out already from my mom and her boyfriend, but nothing yet from Santa. I thought "This is great, he hasn't been here yet." The cookies hadn't been eaten yet either. This was my chance. I knew I was going to meet Santa on this night.

I must have dozed off for a few, but I was awoken to the sound of "Oh God, Oh God, Oh, God!", so realizing it was coming from my mom's room, I ran into her room worried, only to catch her having sex with her boyfriend. So she yells at me "What are you doing in here?" and I said all innocently, "I was waiting up for Santa...and." and she yells at me, "There is no Santa." I was dejected, and looking down, I said, "well where is God?" and she yelled at me, "There is no God! Now get out of here and go to bed." So I closed the door and turned to go to my room. I was frustrated, embarassed and upset. As I walked by, I grabbed the cookies and milk and I went to my room and went to bed. But that was the night I stopped believing in Santa and God.

I hope you enjoyed this. Please leave any feedback you'd like.

- Joe Nicholas